Courtesy of some Weapons Co. boys (The Inconvenience was 2/3, these fellas are 2/2) and hat-tip DaddyGod:

Merry Christmas, gentlemen. Stay safe.

Merry Christmas, y’all.

The Inconvenience won Christmas AND the Internet with his gift to me.

Me: “I wonder what would happen if we could get our hands on the DNA of like, Washington or Jefferson, and clone them.”
The Inconvenience: “I already know what would happen.”
Me: …?
The Inconvenience: “They totally did this on GI Joe. Dr. Mindbender made a clone of like Ghengis Khan, Alexander, Atilla, and a bunch of other asskickers.”
Me: “Oh. Did it turn out well?”
The Inconvenience: “Um, yeah, Serpentor totally made Cobra Commander his bitch.”

Now he’s talking about some other guy named Nemesis Enforcer. I think I’d need to be about five years older to really get this.

A friend just lost her kitten in a bizarre Christmas tree accident. When they left for an overnight trip, they unplugged the Christmas lights – we all know about that precaution. But, the kitten climbed up into the tree and got wrapped up in the lights, and appears to have died from strangulation/compression.

I’ve never heard of such a thing happening. What’s more – the friend it happened to is a veterinarian, and neither she or her friends in the industry have heard of it.

Anyway, I just wanted to post a warning, because it’s something I never would have thought of – but knowing our cat, it doesn’t sound all that unfathomable. Just something extra to keep in mind when it comes to kids/pets and Christmas tree safety.

I happened across the following quote the other day, not long after my Appleseed posts:

“He who dares not offend cannot be honest.” -Thomas Paine

Fitting, I thought, both for that topic and my whole philosophy on blogging in general.

I know absolutely nothing about this other than a) I got an email about it and b) what it says at this link:

http://pilgrimfilms.tv/casting/

They’re apparently holding a casting call for a History Channel marksmanship show (I’m getting the impression they’re calling it “Top Shot”).

Figured I’d pass it along.

Thanks, friend. When I finish funding that dedicated .22LR upper, I think I shall call it the TomareUtsuZo Special.

;)

If you’re hankering for a good train wreck, go read this.

Synopsis: Batshit insane author (Candace Sams) forgets her tinfoil hat and completely loses it over a single one-star review, blaming her editor, the reviewer’s supposed “minions,” everyone on the internets, everyone not on the internets, so on and so forth. (I don’t think she understands the nature of lulz, as she’s convinced everyone who shows up to gawk is there at the behest of the original reviewer.) Then she claims she’s been threatened and has the FBI on the case.

Did I mention this author is behind such instant classics as Electra Galaxy’s Mr. Interstellar Feller (the book at the heart of the controversy), and – as an alternate nom de plume – the fantasy erotica piece Every Witch Way But Loose?

I realize perhaps Ms. Sams’ theory is any publicity is good publicity, so I’m helping to feed the troll by posting this, but I can’t help but share. It’s awfully gee-dee funny. Major hat-tip to Sean, to whom I owe all of tonight’s lulz.

Go check it out. You might even recognize someone who shows up on page 20.

I just finished my last final, and unless I did impossibly horrible on it (which I did not),* I can say with confidence that I made this semester my bitch.

As in: straight-A’s, 4.0, hello dean’s list, etc. etc. etc.

I have been horrible at college prior to this semester. Floundering seems like an appropriate word.

So, yeah. Gloating. Reveling, even. I think I shall go enjoy a celebratory brew.

Also: All those people who were like “Oh, yeah, ‘taking time off school to have a kid,’ enjoy being barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen for the rest of your life, yada yada…” – HA. Told you so. Neener.

*Grade on said final: 94/100. BOOYAH!